I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize