He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize