New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
