i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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