I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
