I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
i think i just lost a toe
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
