Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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