some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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