How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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