So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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