Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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