Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize