um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
