Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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