it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
this boner is exhausting
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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