Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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