he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
