Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
