yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
