I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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