that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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