I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
