I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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