threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
