Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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