just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
