Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
