I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
