Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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