btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
