i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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