you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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