Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
