carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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