I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Plan B is the new Plan A
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
