So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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