no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
The air taste purple.
Randomize
