im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
