butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
