his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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