she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize