The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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