So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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