Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
bring money and cleavage
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
