he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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