and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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