As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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