Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Randomize
