When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
