i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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